Opticians Say the Darndest Things

Let’s just get it out of the way. If the title of this article rings a bell for you, one of two possibilities exist. The first possibility is you’re a Bill Cosby fan. In the mid-1990s he hosted a TV special and then a couple of full seasons of a show of the same title. The second possibility is you’re getting old. Why? Because Cosby’s show was based on a segment of Art Linkletter’s radio show, House Party; this began in 1945, and moved to television through the 1960s. It featured, oddly enough, kids saying the darndest things. While that concept made for great entertainment and high TV ratings, opticians saying the darndest things while dispensing to children will not have similar, positive results.

Sometimes the first thing out of an eye care professional’s mouth sets the stage for disaster. Imagine a really exaggerated, high-pitched whine, speaking far too slowly, “Good morning young man…are you here to pick out some glasses?” Trust me. In this day and age if you speak to a kid in that tone and in that way (assuming the kid is 8 years of age or older) he or she is thinking, “First of all, I’m not a young man, I’m a kid. Second of all, what do you think I’m here for…a pastrami sandwich?” The point being kids today are just a little more sophisticated than we were at their age. To establish credibility with parents, and rapport with the pediatric patient, speak respectfully to both, using the same respectful tone and manner.

Having said that, an effective pediatric dispenser is wise enough to know that what is most important to the parent or guardian is not necessarily what is most important to the child. Realizing what is most important to both parties, and clearly communicating how the features and benefits of your recommendations fulfill those respective desires will ensure your success. So what is most important to the parents? What is it the kid cares about most? Before we delve into and answer those questions, let’s put first things first.

Over the last 30 years, I have discovered that the most challenging parents to deal with are the ones who lack a real appreciation of exactly how their little darling sees without the prescribed correction. This phenomenon does not only apply to kids who are wearing glasses for the first time. You would be amazed at how many parents have kids who have worn glasses for years, but they still do not have a true understanding of what their kid’s vision is like without glasses. I believe it is our responsibility to show them. It’s very easy to do. For example, imagine the kid’s Rx is -3.50 OU. Ask the non-glasses-wearing (emmetrope) mom or dad, “By the way, do you know how Johnny sees without his glasses?” They usually stutter some response that clearly indicates they do NOT have an understanding. “Let me show you,” I say. That’s when I grab a couple of +3.50 lenses from the trial lens kit, or a pair of +3.50 over-the-counter readers. I place them in front of mommy or daddy’s eyes and say, “That’s pretty much how Johnny sees if he doesn’t wear his glasses.” Over the years, I have brought more than one parent to the verge of tears with this simple but dramatic demonstration.

I always do it with kindness and respect, in a non-sarcastic manner, but I think it’s important – especially for parents like the one who bitterly complained about the kid breaking his frame and said, “Hell…school’s out in about 6 weeks…you’re going to have to wait ‘til the end of summer before I get you new ones!” This kid was a 4-diopter myope. Uh-oh…time for a demonstration!

What’s most important to a parent? Parents want to know that the money they are spending on their kid’s eyeglasses is money that’s being well-spent. Physically demonstrating the strength and flexibility of a Flexon®-like material can go a long way to doing just that. Verbally explaining and then showing in writing the terms of your warranty can also add value to the transaction. Consider extending as generous a warranty as you can when it comes to kids. Maybe you normally offer a 90-day or 1-year manufacturing defects warranty. Why not offer a 1-year unconditional warranty for kids? After all, most of your frame vendors extend a similar warranty to you. Over the years, I can count on one hand the number of juvenile patients who “abused” this policy.

Other than protecting their investment, most parents also want to feel they are protecting their kid. If a parent ever balks at the price of eyeglasses (assuming your prices are fair) even after explain the replacement policy…guess what? It’s time for another demonstration! Explain that the lenses you are using are designed to fully protect their child’s eyes and overall eye health. Not only do these lenses filter out 100% of the sun’s harmful ultraviolet rays (which can lead to early onset of things like macular degeneration and cataracts), check this out. That’s when you take your optical hammer, shatter a plastic demo lens, hand them a polycarbonate or Trivex® lens, and ask them to do the same. Have fun with this one. “Hit it harder!” Maybe even let little Johnny try. A brief conversation explaining how this relates to flying projectiles like baseballs, rocks, and BBs might be in order at this point of the demonstration.

In case you haven’t figured it out yet, the kid himself doesn’t give two hoots about money or safety. Sophisticated or not, at this stage of development, from their point-of-view, they are absolutely certain of two things: 1. Money, in fact, does grow on trees, and 2. They are impervious to pain and are going to live forever. So what pushes their buttons? While there might be few other “minor” considerations like improved vision and comfort, they primarily care about one thing: “I’m not going to look like a nerd.” By the way, in terms of ultimately helping them accept the idea of glasses and effectively establishing some rapport and trust, I have found it helpful to describe poor frame choices using a few words and phrases that get their attention. Things like, “I don’t know…those look a little nerdy.” Or, “I’m sure we could find a frame that looks prettier.” If you are brutally honest with the not-so-good looking frames, they’ll eagerly believe you when they try on the perfect fitting frame and you say, “Now those look cool!” Or, “Now those are really pretty.” A phrase like, “Those are very popular this year,” also works well.